Different Types of Couples Therapy: Which One Is Right for You?

So, you’ve decided that maybe, just maybe, it’s time to bring in a professional to help with your relationship. First of all, high five for taking that step! But wait—before you dive into couples therapy, did you know there’s more than one type? Yep, just like how you can’t pick one universal pizza topping that everyone loves (pineapple debate, anyone?), couples therapy comes in different flavors too.

Let’s break down some of the most common types of couples therapy so you can find the one that’s perfect for you and your partner’s unique brand of relationship magic.

1. Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)

What it is: EFT is all about emotions—no surprise there. This approach helps couples identify and understand their emotional responses and patterns, especially the ones that get you into those oh-so-fun repetitive arguments. The goal is to create a stronger emotional bond by helping both partners feel seen, heard, and valued.

Perfect for: Couples who feel emotionally disconnected or stuck in a cycle of negative interactions. If you’re tired of the “you never listen”/“I’m always listening” dance, EFT might be for you.

Why it’s great: It helps you get to the heart of your emotional needs without yelling “You never listen to me!” for the hundredth time.

2. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) for Couples

What it is: If you’ve ever heard of CBT for individuals, you know it’s all about changing unhelpful thought patterns. In couples therapy, CBT works to change the way you and your partner think about and react to situations. Instead of letting negative thoughts spiral into epic arguments (you know, the ones that start over the dishwasher but somehow end with “this is why we’ll never work”), CBT helps you both reframe your thinking to be more constructive.

Perfect for: Couples who tend to overanalyze, jump to conclusions, or get stuck in negative thinking patterns. If your arguments always escalate from “I’m annoyed” to “we’re doomed,” CBT could help tone down the drama.

Why it’s great: It’s like rewiring your brain to stop catastrophizing and start communicating more effectively—minus the melodrama.

3. The Gottman Method

What it is: Developed by relationship experts Drs. John and Julie Gottman (aka the Beyoncé and Jay-Z of relationship science), this method is based on over four decades of research. It’s all about building a strong foundation of friendship, managing conflict constructively (instead of just sweeping it under the rug), and creating shared meaning in your relationship.

Perfect for: Couples who want practical tools and techniques to improve communication and reduce conflict. If you’re into science-backed strategies to turn things around, the Gottman Method is your jam.

Why it’s great: It’s like a relationship toolbox—full of evidence-based tips and tricks to keep you from pulling your hair out the next time you and your partner hit a bump.

4. Imago Relationship Therapy

What it is: Imago therapy is all about understanding how your childhood experiences and past relationships are affecting your current relationship. The theory is that we’re drawn to partners who reflect the positive and negative traits of our early caregivers (yikes, but also, kind of makes sense, right?). In therapy, couples learn to heal those old wounds and communicate more effectively.

Perfect for: Couples who feel like they’re rehashing old emotional wounds over and over again. If you’ve ever said, “You’re just like my mother/father,” Imago therapy might hit home for you.

Why it’s great: It helps you stop playing out your unresolved childhood drama in your current relationship. Less “Mommy issues,” more adult communication.

5. Narrative Therapy

What it is: Everyone loves a good story, right? Well, Narrative Therapy helps couples reframe the stories they’ve been telling themselves about their relationship. Instead of seeing yourselves as two people locked in endless conflict, this approach helps you rewrite your narrative in a way that highlights your strengths and possibilities for growth.

Perfect for: Couples who feel stuck in a negative cycle and need a fresh perspective. If your relationship story reads like a bad rom-com, it’s time to grab the pen and start writing a new script.

Why it’s great: You get to take control of your relationship story and stop seeing yourselves as “the couple who always fights about everything.” A new narrative can make all the difference.

6. Psychodynamic Couples Therapy

What it is: Ah yes, psychodynamic therapy—the deep dive. This approach focuses on uncovering unconscious patterns and emotional baggage that you and your partner might be dragging into the relationship (hint: it’s not just that suitcase you keep in the hallway). It helps you explore why you react the way you do and how past experiences might be influencing your current behavior.

Perfect for: Couples who are ready to get real about the emotional stuff lurking beneath the surface. If you’ve ever thought, “Why do I always react this way?,” psychodynamic therapy might help you figure that out.

Why it’s great: It’s like a relationship MRI—getting a clearer view of what’s really going on beneath all those surface-level arguments.

7. Solution-Focused Therapy

What it is: As the name suggests, this type of therapy is all about solutions. Instead of spending a lot of time analyzing the problem (though that can be helpful too), solution-focused therapy jumps straight into finding practical, actionable steps to move forward.

Perfect for: Couples who are looking for quick, practical solutions and aren’t necessarily into the whole “let’s talk about our feelings for hours” thing.

Why it’s great: If you and your partner just want to get down to business and figure out how to fix things without diving into the emotional abyss, solution-focused therapy is a no-nonsense approach.

Which One’s Right for You?

At the end of the day, the best type of couples therapy is the one that resonates with both of you and feels like the right fit for your relationship. While these are some of the more well-known approaches, they’re definitely not the only ones out there—therapy, like relationships, isn’t one-size-fits-all. The key is finding a method that works for both of you, whether you’re looking to dig deep into emotional patterns or just want practical tools to communicate better.

As for me, I practice psychodynamic therapy, which is all about uncovering those deeper, unconscious patterns that might be influencing your relationship. So, if you’re ready to get to the root of things and explore the ‘why’ behind your reactions and behaviors, psychodynamic therapy could be just what you need.